Payback

I have a bit of mixed feelings tonight. I was invited to attend a student party in my home country with lotsa relatives and other dubious people, about 80 of them I was told. It just didn't work out that I could be there, but it's not an excuse. If I would've wanted it bad enough I would've made it happen, but anyway. I was a bit emotional. But I talked to my cousins daughter, who was the one graduating and she was full of life, having great plans and talking about Barcelona. For a split second I was jealous, but then I landed on my feet again. No way do I want to change, but I can still appreciate the anticipation of life. Everything is open, anything can happen. What a fantastic feeling! And I wanted to tell her that that feeling never goes away...at least not for some people :) Then I talked to my brother and asked him what gift he gave her. Money he said and mentioned the amount. Me: "that's a lot!". Him: "well you gave me half of that some 15 years ago so I figured that was the going rate". Damn me for being so generous! Joke.