Hair and cooking - the nerdy way

Occasionally I am forced to leave my lovely flat, and of course it was for a party. You know one of these where you mingle and drift in and out of conversations. Two of them were quite disturbing. The first one was when the bald guy unzipped his shirt to show how much hair he has on his chest, and attempting to take off the shirt (I guess to show that he had hair on his back - yuk!) but which I managed to put a stop to. He also indicated his jeans. Jeez, the things you don't wanna know about people! The other thing was the man (American!) who told me his way of cooking. This involved an Excel sheet with columns of dinner courses and rows with the time to prepare them so that he could serve everything exactly on time. I really need to choose the people I mix with more carefully!