Happy New Year!

-5°C

Much as I try I can only come up with one thing that is good with Zürich being this cold, that I can keep the white wine on the balcony instead of clogging up the fridge. It's like being in a permanent freezer with no door out. I hate it!

Peace in the middle East

Today I was watching "West Wing" for the second time. This series was so before their time. The episode today was about trying to make peace in the middle East, at the same time reading on live news about the very same thing. Truth is, it'll never happen. And you know why? People are stupid. They fight over a piece of land. A piece of fucking land! I tell you what. When I didn't like "my piece of land" I left. Which is exactly what these people should do. You don't like being shot at? So leave. You don't like your family being threatened? So leave. You don't like the way things are going? So leave. That's all these people have to do. You don't like it? Leave. A piece of land is just a piece of land. Not worth dying over. And if everybody had a brain and used it, they would be gone. And all that would be left would be the fundamentalists. And I'll be happy to watch them kill themselves. You know what they call a leader with no followers? Just a guy taking a walk...

Happy holidays

I really love having time off, being able to sleep in, hang around in pajama, eat, listen to music, watch tv, surf, just relax. Those are good times. However, after having done that a few days it'll be good to get out a bit. Off to the countryside this afternoon to see Tina and then have dinner with some other friends. Partytime is good too.

I can get (no) satisfaction

I don't know who said it gives more satisfaction to give than to get, all I know is that I don't agree. I get great satisfaction in getting. Like tonight I got no less than 4 cd's with great music. Perhaps it was the email I sent some time ago, suggesting Bro to tank down my kinda music. Whatever it was, it worked. I am now the proud owner of songs like 'Smoke on the water', 'Losing my religion', 'Highway to hell', What's love got to do with it', 'Like a prayer', 'No woman no cry', 'Stairway to heaven', 'Every breath you take', 'Born to be wild', 'Livin' on a prayer', 'Great balls of fire', 'All you need i love' and the likes. Me likey very much. And so will my future guests. Last dinner I had one guest even brought his own music! Now I'm gonna rock on!

Love actually

Bro has a hang-up. Every Christmas he has to watch 'Love actually'. I'm not saying it's a bad movie, it ain't but I really do not like the ending. It's too hollywoodized, even though it's English. Too sweet, too much. It's English merged with American, and the English should know better. But hey, it sells. So I guess I cannot complain, even though I've seen it gazillions of times now. Favourite scene: when Hugh Grant playing the prime minister is singing a carol and his bodyguard turns out to be classy singer tuning in. Funny. They should've kept it at that.

Christmas has started

Bro has arrived and we corked up the glühwein, this years product development has led to blueberry glühwein. An interesting taste.

We plan a little pre-tasting Christmas food tonight. Marinated salmon, herring and boiled potatoes, a few egg-halves, some meatballs, a schnapps and a beer. Hurray for the holidays!

PS. And until I read the product description I didn't realize that the white balls on the front are supposed to symbolize snowballs and read '08. So much for having an imagination!

Merry Christmas!

Transportation

I am disturbed. The public transportation had the nerve to change the bus timetable. In good faith I went down tonight to get the bus, and imagine my irritation when seeing the bus time had changed two minutes forward! I cannot believe it. A whole cigarette I had to wait. This is just not on!

Madurodam

Whenever I go out to my usual place I think of Madurodam. Madurodam is a park in the Netherlands where they have small displays of buildings, parks and life in Holland. It's like a miniature of everything. That's exactly like my place in town. The people frequenting are young-old, ugly-beautiful, loud-quiet, short-tall, local-foreigner, drunk-sober (although gotty admit on a Friday eve that the former may have majority), men-women, black-white and tonight even a blind and a deaf. They have only one thing in common. They have fun. And that's not a bad thing. Whenever people can enjoy themselves together, it promotes peace in the world. Yes, I know it sounds pretentious but it's true. In business life we should be able to apply this in a better way. Personally I would never hire anybody if I haven't seen them drunk. I think alcohol brings out the way people really are. They get what's called Dutch courage and say what they really think. Why wouldn't you want to know that in business life? Ok, so it may not be said in exactly the right way, but you'd get a whiff of what would be coming. I take my place over any posh bar or place where you have to "behave", i.e. pretend to be somebody else. F... that!

Time management

My alarm clock is set some 5-10 minutes early. This means that when I am woken up by the alarm I am supposed to think I’m late. I don’t exactly know how many minutes it’s early, but I’m meant to be relieved discovering I am not as late as I thought. I feel relief almost every day. Funny how some things you never want to learn. Mind you, I wouldn’t have matter how early I’d have gotten up this morning. Zürich was covered in 30 cm’s of snow, and the public transportation company was utterly surprised. So surprised they decided not to run any buses at all. Again I sent an email to them requesting exactly what measures had been taken since last time it was bad weather. Would it surprise you to hear I haven’t had an answer yet?

Spare time

I don't know what's happening to me. Yesterday I went shopping for two little Christmas presents to Bro, and today I bought about 5 kg's of spareribs for Saturday. I am becoming a planner. Usually I'm last minute. And being Tuesday and all, I should be on my merry way out and all I want to do is to pre-taste some spare-ribs, pour a glass of glühwein that somehow got leftover from the weekend and curl up on the sofa with West Wing. These are bad signs. What I bought? One calendar with one post-it note per day for 2009 including a joke or a saying from "The Office", and one pair of jockeys. I was going to buy Calvin Klein, which I remember Bro had me shell out for a couple of years ago but I just couldn't bring myself to pay 49 Swissies for a pair of underwear. For myself I usually buy two pairs for 9.90 CHF in Migros. He will just have to do with Jockey for 19.90. The spareribs are for Saturday. Am having 5 men over for dinner, and that should do it I hope. Was instructed to do something with meat and what is more meaty than real Swiss spareribs? And a lot of them too. Mmm, hungry now.

Salsa - at least trying

Very funny with guy visiting this weekend. Told me he could salsa. All I heard this evening was one-two-three, one-two-three. Apparently in England they only got to learn three steps. Anybody impressed?

Janis

Two youngsters joined the evening tonight. I was very relieved that they were not babies but two very tall soon-to-be-men, one 15 and one 17. The younger one had a thing with eating. He didn't stop. By the time I was clearing the plates off the table (having waited an impatient 15 minutes for a smoke) he was still eating.

His name is Jan, and as it turned out it wasn't the first time somebody told him to eat faster. In fact, his mother was once asked whether his name was Janis or Isjan (Jan iss! Iss jan!). Which I know is only funny for German-speaking people what at this particular point in time I don't care.

And since they didn't know what a blog is, they agreed to have their photo posted here.

In good faith

It has an element of stress when you bring new friends to meet old friends. People who have not met each other before. That was made very clear tonight. Especially with new friends who are not entirely fluent in German. New friend: "how old are you?" Old friend: "how old do you think I am?" (and I agree here that it's the wrong counter-question but still). New friend: "drei-und-neunzig". This to German people mean 93, when he meant to say 39. And he will for always be known as the guy you cannot take anywhere. Btw, I'm 32.

Friday night

A bit embarrassing really yesterday. Having a friend staying over the weekend (broken toe-guy) and because we'd gotten on the sauce Thursday, we ended up yesterday having dinner at home and then just crashing on the sofa watching telly. In bed well before midnight, sleeping like babies. On a Friday. I can't begin to tell you how low that feels. Today however is another story. We started with glühwein just after noon, and we'll walk that road for the rest of today. First the Caribbean party and then in town. From here, it can only go up!

German to English for beginners III

Lesson 3: Drei Schweizer Hexen-Schlampen, die sich wünschen geschlechtsumgewandelt zu sein, wünschen sich, Schweizer Swatch Uhrenknöpfe anzuschauen. Welche Schweizer Hexen-Schlampe, die sich wünscht geschlechtsumgewandelt zu sein, wünscht sich, welchen Schweizer Swatch Uhrenknopf anzuschauen? Three swiss witch-bitches, which wished to be switched swiss witch-bitches,wish to watch three swiss Swatch watch switches. Which swiss witch-bitch which wishes to be a switched swiss witch-bitch, wishes to watch which swiss Swatch watch switch?

German to English for beginners II

Lesson 2: Drei geschlechtsumgewandelte Hexen schauen sich drei Swatch Uhrenknöpfe an. Welche geschlechtsumgewandelte Hexe schaut sich welchen Swatch Uhrenknopf an? Three switched witches watch three Swatch watch switches. Which switched witch watch which Swatch watch switch?

German to English for beginners I

Lesson 1: Drei Hexen schauen sich drei Swatch Uhren an. Welche Hexe schaut welche Swatch Uhr an? Three witches watch three swatch watches. Which witch watch which swatch watch?

Dogs are men and cats are women

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary...... 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing! 6:00 pm - Oooh, Bath. Bummer. 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary...... Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards. There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now.................

Broken toe

Remember the guy who shoved his toe into the bed when last being out with me? Well, it turned out he broke it. Didn't stop him from doing the same mistake twice though, so tonight we enjoyed strawberry margueritas, pina coladas and white wine. And music. And dancing. And talking. And...I cannot remember what else. It's Thursday is all I can say.

Cats and dogs

This is so funny. I met with M tonight, remember him? He frequently appeared on my blog when he was my flatmate. Anyway, M has met a new boyfriend. Boyfriend has a cat and a dog, but the dog seems to have shared custody so he hasn't been introduced to M yet, they've only been together for 3 weeks, M and the boyfriend, not the dog.

But that hasn't stopped them for sleeping together though (and why would it? M and the boyfriend if you didn't get it), but the funny thing was when M told me he was waking up in the morning, only to see a furball next to his face. M hates cats. Or so he always said.

Apparently this is no longer the case. "The cat is quite nice actually". On top of that M is going to be cat-sitting for 2 weeks in December when new boyfriend goes off on holiday. How sweet is that?

Advent calendar

I am jealous of this guy I know. His girlfriend has created an advent calendar including a present every day. So far he's gotten a shirt, a bottle of whisky, a bag, a pair of shoes, a tie and a couple of other things. I am looking at him thinking what he does in return for all this affection. Money? Hung like a horse? Promise to marry her? What could it possibly be? Oh yeah, I remember that thing called Lööööve. Hmm I'm thinking. There is no free meal.

Twenty past

I have a talent, which consists of immediately forgetting things that are not important. Which is probably why I can read the same book several times, without being sure of how it ends. I have a hunch maybe, but I cannot be sure. This is the same talent which makes me never remember when the bus goes home. I'm in town, I know the bus is every 12 minutes and therefore I cannot be bothered to remember. However, now in December when it's friggin freezing I wish I had remembered. And the thing is I only have to remember 20 past, then I can calculate the rest. If it's 20 past, it'lll be 32, 44, 56 usw (und so weiter in German, meaning and so on in English). How difficult can it be?

Sperminator

Mildly amusing t-shirt seen tonight.

When you're down the only way is up

I have never believed in anybody else making it happen for you. Trust nobody, and don't get disappointed type of thing. Which is why I decided that Monday wasn't gonna be stopping me from going out. And I can honestly tell you, that after: Rock me Amadeus Smoke on the water Simply the best Highway to hell Losing my religion Knockin' on heavens door We don't need no satisfaction Unchain my heart and Let me find my piece of heaven I really feel better. And a litl bit drunk :). But hey, alcohol is like medicine. And since Switzerland recently voted against marijuana-like products but for free heroin and I have no intention of becoming an addict of any of those substances, I'm sticking to my thing. When you feel down, drink!

Caribbean party

It did cheer me up a bit though when I got invited to a Caribbean party next Saturday. Not sure if the theme is suitable for December, but a party is a party is a party. Am having a friend from England over for the weekend and I'm bringing him, so it'll be very interesting to see what he looks like in a straw skirt! I envision pina coladas, caipirinhas, flowers, sand, heat and light. This can be fun.

Downward spiral

Feel a bit like I'm on downward spiral this winter. Everything same-same, go to bed, get up, do what I need to do, not much fun. Think it's all this cold and grey weather that gets to me. Not even in blog-mood. Today an acquaintance of mine flew off to India for a month. Imagine 32° and sunshine for a whole long month. Makes me even more depressed. Why I am left here in freezing Europe? With three months to go before I fly off to warmer places. Life's not fair in case you hadn't noticed before.

You learn something new every day

...whether you like it or not. Today I learned that your arm span is usually shorter than your length, meaning if you elevate your arms out from your body in a 90° angle it's often shorter than your length. I learned this today when borrowing a guys jacket and the sleeves went down to my knees. What he didn't tell me was if fingers count, because if they do my span is 1.68 compared to my height 1.65, i.e. long arms. But what if cannot count the fingers? I have to find out. But not now.

IT Factory II

Further read-up on the story reveals murder-threat to a journalist and connections to Hells Angels.

Show me an honest businessman somebody! Apart from Ingvar Kamprad that is. Fairly sure he's a what-you-see-is-what-you-get-kinda-guy.

IT Factory I

This is, or rather was, a company in Denmark which last week got elected "best-growth-company" in the last year, getting prices left-right-center and being praised by Ernst&Young. This week the CEO has allegedly run off with 87M$, and the chairman claims his signature has been forged. Yeah right. The reason I doubt it, is that I've come across this chairman when working in Denmark. Not an honest bone in his body. Has probably hid the money in a safe country, waiting for everything to blow over, then living the good life somewhere. That'll be at least the second time he gets away with a scam like this.

CIA Interview

The CIA had an opening for an assassin... After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists; two men and a woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. 'We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair... kill her!!' The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife.' The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.' The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes.'I tried, but I can't kill my wife.' The agent said, 'You don't have what it takes. Take your wife home.' Then it was the woman's turn... She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow. 'This gun is loaded with blanks,' she said. 'I had to beat him to death with the chair.' MORAL: Women are crazy. Don't mess with them.