Personally I am very strict when I make appointments, whether it's business or private. I think if you've committed, you show up. Therefore I have a problem with people who don't. Especially when it happens more than once, like 50% of the time.
I know, there are reasons always. Sickness, accidents, something more important than going for a dinner or showing up at a meeting.
Nevertheless, I can only think of one or two times in my life when I have done the same. For me keeping a promise is crucial.
I don't know why I am like this, probably because that's how I was raised. And therefore I react strongly when not everybody is like me.
It's not like I'm not understanding why somebody cancels a simple dinner, and the reasons why, but I do get very disappointed. After all there is some preparation involved.
But what I most react to is cancellations at a late stage, like the same day. If I would cancel a commitment the same day, I would make sure the recipient got the message. Not just send a text and hope it's read.
And yes, it happened to me today. I was busy preparing everything, buying extra stuff to make the dinner special and then I recieved a message very late cancelling everything. Fortunately I had another friend coming along, who really enjoyed my efforts. But still, it's disappointing and even though the reason is more than understandable, I am feeling like I won't try to invite this person again.
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2 comments:
at first I was thinking you were being a bit harsh, given you said they had a good reason, but then I realised they only sent you a text. That is just not on. For a last minute cancellation, especially at someone's house where they have had to put a lot of work in, you'd better have a very good reason, and call in person full of apologies so you know that you reached the person.
I know a few people who are unreliable like this and sadly I do not invite them anymore unless its with a group of people of which some of the others are reliable so it wont really matter then they don't turn up.
B
The problem is I really like this person, even though I don't agree with this behaviour. I'll stick to your strategy in the future.
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